Communication & Mutual Problem Solving.

The way we communicate with others and with ourselves ultimately determines the quality of our lives. We are surrounded by different types of communications, such as verb and nonverbal communications, and each of those types plays a big role in our daily activities. Mostly, people find a really easy way to communicate nonverbally and as well through virtuality. Teenagers especially, find it really interesting to express their feelings when they send a text message, take pictures, etc. This new method has the benefits of itself and as well the opposite of that. Technology had come in many ways, which can make the lives of people really convenient and easy to communicate. One of the biggest investments that had come to those last couple of decades, is the internet and social media. Internet is well used for education, communication, receiving notifications from the apps, navigating in different websites, etc. A long time ago, when it was needed to send a message between two countries, most likely it took more that one month or depending on which country was the conversation to be held. Nowadays we are grateful that technology had come with many resources for us by making everything faster and easier. On the other hand, we can learn and develop even more our pieces of information by using the Internet, Wikipedia, Google, etc. However, we can find some negative ways of using this kind of communication.
 

First of all, we do not find a direct connection between the person that we are talking and this can not express all the feelings that we are feeling. Social media plays a big impact on this field. Scrolling on Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram, TikTok, etc, we see that the idea of the personality should be the same or the style and the language that we use. Mostly, those people are not real with their own situations but they try to hide or fake till they become “queens” of social media.


Prioritizing this way of communication is not the best way that we should use in our family and especially in marriage. Communication work for those who work at it. Key to a goal relationship-to accept each others’ faults, to discuss, and not argue and always do your best to control your feelings when you are upset. Couples are a good example that we can see the way that manege situations when conflict comes in their marriage. In my own experience is a compelling example of this. My parents had been married for more than 27 years old. Looking at them as an example of love and cooperation, made me ask them for some good advice that I should practice in my future marriage and why not with my friends and roommates.

 

I would like to share some of that advice with you today.

• Listen more than you speak.
• Understand the other person first. 
• Understand the needs, wishes, and values. 
• Begin with empathy. 
• Take responsibility for your feelings. 
• Make requests that are practical, specific, and positive. 
• Use accurate, neutral descriptions.

The biggest communication problem is we do not listen to understand but we listen to reply. Most of the time, young missionaries when they go for the first time they were introduced in one famous phrase “forget yourself and go to work”. This is from one of the leaders of my church “Gordon. B. Hinckley. Forgetting your self is relating to the conversation that we make with other people by leaving behind many negative feelings and selfishness. Prioritizing the other person and being able to talk clearly can help and as well result in many problems.
 

Like my parents and other couples, they do learn from experiences and each has the struggles in marriage or family. However, it is our responsibility to be open with one another in the way we talk, speak, and express our feeling. The art of communication is the language of leadership.-James Humes-